Back In The Day

Psalm 33:11 -- "But the plans of the Lord stand firm forever, the purposes of his heart through all generations."

Me: At Home in the Philippines - photo by Karl D Babb

Rushing myself through the morning routine and fidgeting relentlessly as my mom tried to put my hair into pig-tails, I could not wait for the school Jeepney to arrive.  I was a bundle of energy and excitement. The day before I had finally managed to stay on my bike all by myself. I couldn't wait to show my friends. I was going to ride through the gates at the end of the drive way when the Jeepney drove up. I would show everyone I had mastered my bicycle.

 It would be so perfect!

In my head I could see all my friends cheer and clap as I pulled up along side the Jeepney and skidded to a halt, kicking up dust from the dirt road. And as the dust plume billowed out around my back tire I would grin and hand the bike off to my mom so she could take it back inside as I headed off to school.

Yup, perfect!

I had a plan! A purpose! I was driven and focused, determined with my eyes steady on the goal!

But as the large gates painted brown and streaked with rust groaned in complaint and provided an opening for my grand entrance, my front tire hit a rock at just the right angle and - already wobbly from my lack of skill - turned too far to the right, pitching me forward and eventually off the bike. I was dumped unceremoniously onto my rear-end right there in front of the entire school. [All 15 students of the little one-room school house].

Tears stung my eyes, my hands ached from hitting the concrete, and my tush was sore. Back in the day, all I had to do was get a big hug from my mom and a kiss on the cheek. Soft verbal encouragement - confirmation that my mom was proud of my efforts.

It seems my goals are a lot more complicated now and the failure to reach them so much more painful than the tumble on the bike I took all those years ago. Things REALLY did seem more simple back in the day.

And not unlike the difference between my star-spangled perspective of yester-year and the clearly outlined focus of the here and now: it would seem that my relationship with my Savior seemed so much more simple when I first believed. Things were clearly layed out before me. There was black and there was white.

Today is would seem that there are more shades of gray than I can even begin to count and the lines between them aren't clearly defined. Where I was more honest with myself about what I was growing through as a child, today I am more likely to bite my tongue and keep the growing pains all to myself. I might not remember to be grateful for the victories, and I surely don't always express the disappointment of my failures.

But God hasn't changed. His plans stand firm and the purposes of His heart are indeed, steadfast. How He loved me as I grew through my childhood, so He will love my children as they grow through theirs.

When the earth seems to shake beneath our feet and our eyes need bi-focals to see things a little more clearly, it might do us all some good to stay focused on our Rock, our Forever, our Steadfast Lord.